That sounds kind of cliché, but it really is true for me. I am so very very happy. I look back on my slightly more than half a century (now THAT'S sobering...) and I have usually been very happy in my circumstances. However, since this move from "out West" to "down East" (not sure if that is just a Canadian or also an American vision of our countries) I just have so MANY moments now where I literally feel I am oozing happiness from my entire being. No, it is not just a hotflash either!! And I just want to SHARE this profound happiness that goes deep deep into the core of my being.
I am a fairly passionate person, and oftentimes I get so excited by what I see, or hear or feel--! For example, this morning, I was walking my dog along the Greenway, a trail that meanders through a good part of Essex County, and the colours of some of the wildflowers just sang: goldenrod just glowing yellow, juxtaposed against the purple of asters, their green foliage providing the backdrop, and then a spattering of white star-shaped flowers nodding beside them, tiny aster types themselves, but I have no clue what they are. Googled pictures and they may be autumn blooming clematis, but who knows. The colours just took my breath away. Nature's perfection. I thought of a quilt immediately too! No phone on me to snap a picture. I love the trees in this town, so many different ones, my favourites the plane trees, since I first saw some and could not get over their "camouflage" bark (!) in Nice, France, along with the cottonwoods, HUGE, 100+ year old ones here apparently, and what I think may be black maple, as the leaves are black and maple-shaped. Apparently if this is what they are, they are closely related to sugar maples and you can get maple syrup from both! I often feel a need to just touch these trees, feel their energy (calm), think about what they have seen in their lifetimes. I marvel at the architecture on Kingsville's beautiful old (many well over a century) stately homes, many of them know as Painted Ladies, I believe. And then there's Lake Erie, shimmering in the sun, diamonds glinting off her gentle waves, or roaring with fury, surf crashing against the harbour wall, reminiscent of Hawaii, or sometimes in the early morning, still, like a mirror.
I guess it's due in part to having TIME to marvel at the clear blue sky, or the intense red of a cardinal, being so overjoyed to hear Baltimore orioles singing and chirruping to each other (I so loved them on our acreage out West), and then being humbled and thankful to acknowledge my body's ability to see, to hear, to touch...you get the picture. I have always been a Nature lover, but it's that, along with time to sew, to create, time to read, happiness in finding a great yoga studio with like-minded people, joy at being able to share my love of yoga through teaching (the Universe lined up yet again to give me this job!), gratitude at sharing a garden home (aka semi-detached) with such a wonderful, SO similar, couple, more gratitude at living on a lane where there are such great neighbours, in a town that I've loved since the 80s, love that I feel for friends from the West to the south of Florida who keep in touch in so many ways, awe that I have a condo to fly away to for the winter months, love for all of my family, especially the best grandchild in the land. :-)
I think TIME is a key factor here. Keeping life simple, (not having to work anymore definitely helps in that department!) enjoying the pleasures that have no $$ attached, yet are priceless. I've tried to capture in words some of the deep, bubbling up bursts, almost tangible in their intensity, of utter joy I have in my being. I wish everyone could feel this way.
Oh, and let's be honest; there are many times in my days that I feel grumpy or ticked about something or other, but the cool thing is that these moments rarely last now. I guess because I consciously acknowledge all my current blessings? I have a long way to go on this journey of life, but I am making steady progress!